PERSISTINT

Need support?

Being hurt by another girl or woman is real harm. It can look like being shut out of the group, rumours, cruel comments about your body or looks, pile-ons online, or a friend or partner who controls who you see and what you do. If any of that is happening to you, you deserve support, and the people below are there to help.

If you are in danger or thinking of hurting yourself

Reach out now. These lines are free and there are people ready to talk.

  • Canada

    • If your safety is at risk, call 9-1-1 right away.
    • 9-8-8: Suicide Crisis Helpline: call or text 9-8-8, 24/7/365.
    • Kids Help Phone (children, teens and young adults): call 1-800-668-6868, 24/7, in multiple languages, or text CONNECT to 686868. Indigenous youth can text FIRST NATIONS, INUIT or METIS to 686868 to ask for a First Nations, Inuk or Métis crisis responder, if one is available. Live chat with a professional counsellor runs from 7 p.m. to midnight ET.

  • United States

  • United Kingdom

    • In an emergency, call 999.
    • Childline (NSPCC) (children and young people): call free on 0800 1111, or use 1-2-1 counsellor chat online. Deaf young people can use BSL via an interpreter.
    • Samaritans: call 116 123, free, day or night, 365 days a year.

  • Ireland

  • Australia

  • New Zealand

    • If someone is in immediate danger, call 111.
    • 1737: call or text 1737, free, 24/7.
    • Youthline (young people): call free 0800 376 633, 24/7, free text 234, webchat 24/7, or WhatsApp 09 886 56 96.

Support services

Services for girls and women hurt by other girls and women.

Bullying between girls

  • United States · works internationally

    Kind Campaign

    A nonprofit organization that brings awareness and healing to the lasting effects of girl-against-girl bullying, through school assemblies, Kind Clubs and a documentary film.

Abuse or control by a female partner

  • Canada · Vancouver, British Columbia

    Battered Women’s Support Services (BWSS): Surviving to Thriving

    A support group for self-identified lesbian, bisexual, trans*, Two Spirit and queer women who have experienced intimate partner violence, including abuse by a female partner. The group page dates from 2017, so call the intake line to ask what is running now.

    Crisis and Intake Line: 604-687-1867, toll-free 1-855-687-1868, Intake@bwss.org.

  • Ireland

    Women’s Aid: LGBTI+ support

    Domestic abuse support for women of any sexuality, including transgender women, with information on abuse in same-sex relationships.

    National Freephone Helpline: 1800 341 900, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Instant Message support mornings and evenings, 7 days a week.

Screening tools

Validated questionnaires used in research and clinical screening for borderline personality disorder (BPD), narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), and the Dark Triad, each with the study that validated it.

Borderline personality disorder (BPD)

  • McLean Screening Instrument for BPD (MSI-BPD)

    What it measures
    Ten yes-or-no self-report items screening for BPD. In the validation study a cutoff of 7 of 10 gave a sensitivity of .81 and a specificity of .85.
    Validation paper
    Zanarini, M. C., Vujanovic, A. A., Parachini, E. A., Boulanger, J. L., Frankenburg, F. R., & Hennen, J. (2003). A screening measure for BPD: The McLean Screening Instrument for Borderline Personality Disorder (MSI-BPD). Journal of Personality Disorders, 17(6), 568–573. https://doi.org/10.1521/pedi.17.6.568.25355 (PubMed)
    Take it
    No free official online version was found; the instrument is described in the validation paper.

  • BPD screening in young people (ages 15 to 25)

    What it measures
    Compares how four BPD screeners (MSI-BPD, BPQ, IPDE-SQ and the SCID-II questionnaire) perform with outpatients aged 15 to 25.
    Validation paper
    Chanen, A. M., Jovev, M., Djaja, D., McDougall, E., Yuen, H. P., Rawlings, D., & Jackson, H. J. (2008). Screening for borderline personality disorder in outpatient youth. Journal of Personality Disorders, 22(4), 353–364. https://doi.org/10.1521/pedi.2008.22.4.353 (PubMed)

Narcissism and NPD

  • Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI-40)

    What it measures
    The standard research measure of everyday (subclinical) trait narcissism: 40 pairs of statements, 5 to 10 minutes. It measures the trait, not NPD.
    Validation paper
    Raskin, R., & Terry, H. (1988). A principal-components analysis of the Narcissistic Personality Inventory and further evidence of its construct validity. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 54(5), 890–902. https://doi.org/10.1037//0022-3514.54.5.890 (PubMed)
    Take it
    openpsychometrics.org/tests/NPI (Open-Source Psychometrics Project)

  • Pathological Narcissism Inventory (PNI)

    What it measures
    Pathological narcissism, closer to NPD than the NPI: 52 self-report items across 7 dimensions, covering both the grandiose and the vulnerable sides. Scores were linked with aggression and borderline personality organization.
    Validation paper
    Pincus, A. L., Ansell, E. B., Pimentel, C. A., Cain, N. M., Wright, A. G. C., & Levy, K. N. (2009). Initial construction and validation of the Pathological Narcissism Inventory. Psychological Assessment, 21(3), 365–379. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0016530 (PDF, Penn State)
    Take it
    No free official online version was found; the instrument is described in the validation paper.

The Dark Triad

  • Short Dark Triad (SD3)

    What it measures
    Scores for the three Dark Triad traits, Machiavellianism, narcissism and psychopathy: 27 statements, median time 2 minutes 27 seconds, results free.
    Validation paper
    Jones, D. N., & Paulhus, D. L. (2014). Introducing the Short Dark Triad (SD3): A brief measure of dark personality traits. Assessment, 21(1), 28–41. https://doi.org/10.1177/1073191113514105 (PubMed)
    Take it
    openpsychometrics.org/tests/SD3 (Open-Source Psychometrics Project)

  • Dirty Dozen

    What it measures
    The Dark Triad in 12 items, the shortest validated measure.
    Validation paper
    Jonason, P. K., & Webster, G. D. (2010). The dirty dozen: A concise measure of the dark triad. Psychological Assessment, 22(2), 420–432. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0019265 (PubMed)
    Take it
    No free non-commercial online version was found; the items are in the validation paper.

For research on social aggression, cyberbullying, body-shaming and coercive control by girls and women, see Further reading.